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A Reflection

by To Be Gentle

/
1.
Will you come home from that dreaded place? You answer me with a pale hand Breathing so still, you suffocate me with apologies That I've been dying to tell you I'll bring you back to where it's safe and warm How much have you missed me since you've been gone? I need you here with me Believe me when I say I won't let go And I will always be here with you All the things I was too scared to say to you How you've made me who I am How you've saved me from destruction All the things I was too scared to say to you How you've made me who I am How you've saved me from myself
2.
Aftermath 02:38
These voices from the past They say I am alone And that it will be the death of me And I tell them I am unafraid, And that with you joy will follow me All the days of my life When passion shrivels up, Left to rot in the aftermath, You remind me that I’ll be ok Tear through this canvas Strewn with heavy blots This portrait says I am alone But together, you and I will repaint it With you I can live my truth And I can be the person I want to be With you I can live my truth And say “I am unafraid” This is for you
3.
I am unafraid of the aftermath And will not run away I heard screaming from the kitchen And walked towards the staircase With knots in my gut Broken glass lined your words like shrapnel: “Selfish pig, I hate you” I lied to myself I’ll never say again, that I love you I’d leap to my death before I’d leave myself alone with you and these thoughts I am unafraid Of the aftermath And will not run away I am unafraid and will not run away Breaking down These scary thoughts There seems to be a hand that rests on my shoulder, holding me back I am unafraid Breaking down these scary thoughts
4.
If you are reading this We are all connected and we all love you Some of us don't know it yet You are deeply loved, pass it on I love you just the way you are right now I love you just the way you are Any shame or guilt you have felt in your past, it's not your fault You are loved in this moment We are all connected You are deeply loved You are loved deeply in this moment I love you just the way you are
5.
I would rip myself apart before I'd see you do the same to yourself Please just know that I'll keep you safe and warm Away from all these pains and aches that trouble you I am grateful for you in my life I will never take you for granted I feel so deeply for you I hurt for these wrongdoings that have been plaguing you These curses that have been looming over your shoulder Will soon come to a close Back and forth these thoughts fade in and out Over and over again One day these words spoken from A heartfelt dialect will become clear One day we will no longer hurt One day we will not hurt And our curses will no longer be here to haunt us This is the sound of a love ascending Through my being, my spirit, my everything Oh, remember our dreams, and how much this means to me Oh, remember our dreams, and how much you mean to me This is the sound of a love unprecedented
6.
That which is safe Stay with me I am sorry For this heartbreak that I have caused to you And for leaving all of this behind And I will never be able to wash this guilt from myself I am weak (bereft of fulfillment) Hurt goes on (this language of wrongdoing) Speak softly (and be gentle) I love you (I'm sorry) You are a gift that has blessed me With finer things And I'm the one who threw it all away I welcomed dread into your place And it was worse than when I was starving to death Cold and emaciated Starving to death And I would rather starve for eternity than see Your universe close its eyes to our joys together You and I
7.
The night we were assaulted I wept into your arms And embraced my strength The heaving of a thousand oxen I was truly afraid Shattered glass and blood-soaked concrete paved the way to my discovery: I am not afflicted with disease or burden These thoughts are a blessing and a gift A tenet of growth You are the blood in my veins I love you and I am sorry The thought of losing you terrifies me

about

To Be Gentle presents "A Reflection": a session that revisits some of the group's favorite songs that have been written and recorded, depicted now "live".
For most of To Be Gentle's 5-year lifespan, guitarist and vocalist Eve Beeker has been at the forefront of the project, writing and recording the vast majority of the discography. As To Be Gentle is a collective more so than a band, "A Reflection" has provided an opportunity to re-imagine the songs as they would sound in a full band setting.
Partnering with Gillian Carter's very own Logan Rivera behind the engineering helm, together they have sculpted a mix that represents what you would hear in a live session.

To Be Gentle was founded in 2017 by Eve Beeker and Pat Fisher.

credits

released July 23, 2022

Recorded by Eve Beeker
Mixed, mastered, and engineered by Logan Rivera
Cover by Eve Beeker and Logan Rivera
All music written by To Be Gentle

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To Be Gentle Eugene, Oregon

Love is the only way out

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