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1. |
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Will you come home from that dreaded place?
You answer me with a pale hand
Breathing so still, you suffocate me with apologies
That I've been dying to tell you
I'll bring you back to where it's safe and warm
How much have you missed me since you've been gone?
I need you here with me
Believe me when I say I won't let go
And I will always be here with you
All the things I was too scared to say to you
How you've made me who I am
How you've saved me from destruction
All the things I was too scared to say to you
How you've made me who I am
How you've saved me from myself
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2. |
Aftermath
02:38
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These voices from the past
They say I am alone
And that it will be the death of me
And I tell them I am unafraid,
And that with you joy will follow me
All the days of my life
When passion shrivels up,
Left to rot in the aftermath,
You remind me that I’ll be ok
Tear through this canvas
Strewn with heavy blots
This portrait says I am alone
But together, you and I will repaint it
With you I can live my truth
And I can be the person I want to be
With you I can live my truth
And say “I am unafraid”
This is for you
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3. |
I Am Unafraid
04:25
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I am unafraid of the aftermath
And will not run away
I heard screaming from the kitchen
And walked towards the staircase
With knots in my gut
Broken glass lined your words like shrapnel:
“Selfish pig, I hate you”
I lied to myself
I’ll never say again, that I love you
I’d leap to my death before I’d leave myself alone with you and these thoughts
I am unafraid
Of the aftermath
And will not run away
I am unafraid and will not run away
Breaking down
These scary thoughts
There seems to be a hand that rests on my shoulder, holding me back
I am unafraid
Breaking down these scary thoughts
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4. |
If You Are Reading This
07:15
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If you are reading this
We are all connected and we all love you
Some of us don't know it yet
You are deeply loved, pass it on
I love you just the way you are right now
I love you just the way you are
Any shame or guilt you have felt in your past, it's not your fault
You are loved in this moment
We are all connected
You are deeply loved
You are loved deeply in this moment
I love you just the way you are
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5. |
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I would rip myself apart before I'd see you do the same to yourself
Please just know that I'll keep you safe and warm
Away from all these pains and aches that trouble you
I am grateful for you in my life
I will never take you for granted
I feel so deeply for you
I hurt for these wrongdoings that have been plaguing you
These curses that have been looming over your shoulder
Will soon come to a close
Back and forth these thoughts fade in and out
Over and over again
One day these words spoken from
A heartfelt dialect will become clear
One day we will no longer hurt
One day we will not hurt
And our curses will no longer be here to haunt us
This is the sound of a love ascending
Through my being, my spirit, my everything
Oh, remember our dreams, and how much this means to me
Oh, remember our dreams, and how much you mean to me
This is the sound of a love unprecedented
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6. |
That Which Is Safe
02:57
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That which is safe
Stay with me
I am sorry
For this heartbreak that I have caused to you
And for leaving all of this behind
And I will never be able to wash this guilt from myself
I am weak (bereft of fulfillment)
Hurt goes on (this language of wrongdoing)
Speak softly (and be gentle)
I love you (I'm sorry)
You are a gift that has blessed me
With finer things
And I'm the one who threw it all away
I welcomed dread into your place
And it was worse than when I was starving to death
Cold and emaciated
Starving to death
And I would rather starve for eternity than see
Your universe close its eyes to our joys together
You and I
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7. |
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The night we were assaulted I wept into your arms
And embraced my strength
The heaving of a thousand oxen
I was truly afraid
Shattered glass and blood-soaked concrete paved the way to my discovery:
I am not afflicted with disease or burden
These thoughts are a blessing and a gift
A tenet of growth
You are the blood in my veins
I love you and I am sorry
The thought of losing you terrifies me
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